So a writer friend of mine received a contract offer from Harlequin a few days ago. Am I happy for her? Of course I am. She is a great story teller and as I've told her in critique group, she has a great voice. Am I jealous? We are told not to be jealous of other writer's success but to be honest, yea, just a little. Why? Because she has the drive and the passion to follow her dream. I on the other hand, am mired in self pity. I'm too old. I'm not good enough. It's too late for me. I don't have any new ideas. I could go on and on. But what's the point? I have a lot of demons. She writes about demons and reapers and all sorts of weird people. I can kind of relate.
But, perhaps a little jealousy is a good thing. It can motivate. It can spur you on to become better at what you do. I can't change the past, my present is pretty much unchangeable. Can this little bit of jealousy help me change my future?
On the positive side, I did start writing again. I wrote a 1500 word scene to add to my book. And I have a lot of scenes to add. So I'll keep plugging away. Who knows????? Maybe she will be just a little jealous of me one day!