Yep, it's been a while. What excuse can I give? Hmmm, let's see. Laziness seems to top the list. Or I can use; not enough time, not enough ideas, lack of motivation (see laziness), nobody bugging me for new posts (actually, I can't use that one. A friend did ask me why I haven't posted). Or I could go the pity party route. I've already mentioned in a previous post how I let myself get really discouraged after a less than stellar pitch and critique at ORACON last June. But, that was six months ago. I don't think I can legally use that excuse any more. So let's just go with laziness.
In my defense, I've always been a little lazy. Sure if something had to be done, I would do it. But, if I could put it off or forget it all together, I was good. I have no trouble just sitting and staring out a window for a long period of time. Or, just sitting and staring at the wall. I know a lot of people who balk at the idea of not being busy all the time. Not me. I'm most happy doing nothing. But, that doesn't get you very far in life. Sitting and staring into space, twirling your hair with your fingers, doesn't make dreams come true. In fact, it might land you in the loony bin if you do it in front of too many people.
So what's the answer? Ignore my true self that loves being lazy? Kick that person to the curb and go full steam ahead? Or should I accept I'm not going to change who I am this late in the game? Perhaps somewhere in between? A compromise. Quit beating myself up for not being as productive as others and attempt to get back in the groove of making my dream come true. As a fellow writer friend and I were discussing this weekend - we are getting too old to waste much time hoping and wishing. But, there's always going to be time to sit and stare. Just sayin'.